This time round, it wasn't the past I was thinking about, but rather, the present.
Today was supposed to be just like any other day, but somehow, I fell into depression. Changes have triggered unexpected feelings; left me chagrined.
The late afternoon brought along more questions, questions that pose no answers. For hours, I sat still on the couch, pondering, wondering. Even after I had company in the evening, for a short while, the sound of laughter seemed so distant, yet it was ever so close.
What am I doing...?
If I think anymore... what will happen?
Can I think anymore...?
*** ***
Here I am, back home.
My mind felt clear, clearer with confusion. How ironic.
I willed my mind to shut out everything unpleasant.
I wanted to be alone, away from myself; by myself, but how is that possible? Does it even make sense?
YW, I pray that you'll be strong. The vicissitudes of life posts no easy path through.
I'm sorry L. I wasn't myself. I'm sorry I caused you to worry. Do forgive me, if you ever read this.
*** ***
Curling into a ball instinctively, I prayed and hoped the new day that awaits would bring about a new start to my life.